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Being a Human

July 19, 2010

Assume that you are having only few days on this earth. Yes! you may be leaving this beautiful earth in next few days.  Stop worrying. Now go!! go ahead and write down all important things remaining in your life and schedule it in next five days!! Go get some paper or open textpad and start writing. Forget everything let the world freeze for the moment only concentrate on writing what you want to do actually. what you feel, just write down. Only after  writing move to next para.

Ok! so you prepared list or still feeling lazy!! It is very important for you. Done!! Hmm. read things once again, have you forgot to include something!! feels yes!! you are still having time add it.

Now take a look at the list. This.. this is the most important thing you need to do, Today. Yes, we keep on procrastinating most important thing due to various personal factors(like fear,anxiety, shyness, ego, arrogance and many others). But now, you may not be having enough time to delay it further very few days left. So take initiative TODAY or suffer forever. Add it to your TODO list for activities to be done after reading this topic.

Congratulations, we may be having little bit more time yes, about a year or so more!! Everyone started claiming of the world transition from Kalyuga to Satyuga in 2012(see videos) and this period is known as SangamYug – Last 100 years of transition, which is mostly at its end.

There can be many reasons : Solar maximum(Solar Flares), Mayan Calendar, Bible Code(Armageddon and , Predictions from the lost book of Nostradamus, Planet-X Nibiru Strike, Galactic Alignment(Shifting of poles)) or any other. But we will still think all these things are wrong.. it is just for the sake of our convenience.

(related article: http://planet-x.150m.com/washpost.html – Finding of Planet X – 1983)

So in 2014 we(ok.. some of us.. ) will be in Satyuga(Golden Age)!! Aha!! The period of our dream. The period where the word security, dishonesty, jealousness, greed, ego, lust does not exist. Everyone feel the same way others do.. Happiest ever, no difference between status.  All are happy and everything is very smooth. All of us are united with the divine love and eternal happiness. Stress free secured life.. everyone know their responsibility and they are managing without any pain!!

Do you want to be a part of this perfect period?  For most of us it may be the best dream. Yes! it is. But it was true and it is going to be true again..

So lets make the list why our world is not like that —

Everyone is greedy people know only “Money”.. many of them can do anything for it. Corrupted leaders!! People have no fear of god, in lying, being dishonest, betray someone, breaking hearts.

Everyone wanted to become bigger, richer. Money is considered as status symbol!! Level of self respect gone down.. ego and arrogance at its best, hashing natural resources. Fighting for regions but NOT for humanity and many more.

Phew!! too big list. Many of us including me believe that there was period of Satyuga – Golden Age. We have seen destructing factors!! but what about common factors!!

At Satyug(Golden Age). world is driven by humans. Yes!! completely like us and yet they able to get lots lots of happiness. Wait!! Have I written “like us”.. are they having some trails? We feel that they are same.. human.. .with in general, two legs, two eyes, two ears, one nose but yes they are far different than us. NO not in physical appearance, but in values.

When we started jotting down cause of the problem, we forgot the biggest cause. It is us. Yes! we!! we don’t want to change ourself, forget about others!! We don’t even understand that we are so corrupted now. Are we having same thoughts when we were 5-6 year old child!! NO!! Why?

Because we adjusted to be a part of this corrupted world and started contributing to it. Shameful.. but true. Actually world is not making us, we are making this world.

We don’t want to change ourself and still keep on cursing others – how many times you realized that you don’t have rights to laugh on others because that person is more skilled? We are too lazy, we wanted God to destroy earth and do the needful but We, as a person will NEVER change!!

It is always easy to fall but difficult to rise.

I recalled a small story:
Once upon a time, Dr. Sunil was practicing in a small town. He got the case of a teenager who turned into chain smoker and having smoking problem. Dr told him to come tomorrow.. On the next day, Dr. repeated the same thing.. come tomorrow. After a month or so, doctor given prescription and suggested him solution. Everyone was in wonder!! What miracle happened today!! Patient’s father asked doctor – Doctor if you were already aware about the solution, why you haven’t helped my son earlier! Doctor replied – At that time, I was also having smoking problem. Now I left smoking!

The simple meaning – Improvement of the whole world starts with-in.

Ok! got enough lecture; lets concentrate on how can I make things better or as an alternative, how can I add to improvement.

You might have thought in one of the similar way. But I believe this article may be the first one to give a clear insight of the fact that how difficult and yet how easy, it is to be a human. What is expected from us. Why god has created such an intelligent species. Among all these problems, this uneven world what we are actually expected to do and lot more.

Ok

Taking brief into account.

Does God really exists?

Who read the heading “Does..”. Who  is reading all these things.. Human.. ok ..  is it your body? NO .. then.. soul? .. soul is neutral and rarely have opinion.. so NOT even soul? then.. ya we are actually made of energy which flow in all of us. I believe that it is combination of good and bad, It is in align with the concept of Chinese Dragons(Yang and Yin). Everyone may be aware about aura – the energy surrounding us. So generally good part can be considered as god and bad part as demon. We are combination of both, but at the end we are having power of taking out the black part.

Why god created human?

Simply, to experience happiness. Ya! Bit odd, but true. God has created us to experience enormous happiness and love, which always exist on world.

So Happiness? what on earth.. biggest joke.. It may be true about 200 years ago or so. Not now, in this fast life..so much uneven world.. lots of pain, broken hearts, greediness, fights, natural calamity and many more mishaps.. god has given us such a bad life..This may be thinking of many of us. But it is NOT true.

Ok.. rather than talking about the whole world, we should drill down to much lower level. We, the human are responsible for most of the things. So it is the time we should revisit expectations from us.

What  is the expectation?

No .. it is not the list of hundreds of element. Simply “Be human”

Being a Human

I feel sorry to say that most of us totally lost our values. No if you are old.. you might have  started abusing modernism. Being modern is not bad. Even I believe that modernism is far better than our past. My interpretation of modernism is to have free thoughts, free from science, free from rituals and free from past. Just what we feel. Modernism is “getting rid of past and enjoying today”.

Idealism may be an abuse but it is very important to experience happiness.

What is human nature? Should we go and ask to the person who keeps on killing each other on name of terrorism, religions, politics.. or borders? No!!

  • Biggest thing can be being HONEST. Yes, Honesty is the biggest thing, even in this world.. it is. Honesty don’t mean honesty to our goal. But Honesty means to be honest to yourself first then others. Truth lies on the base of honesty. You can’t fully enjoy what you have if you are not Honest. Believe it or not if you feel that you are .. then it is obvious there is much more  happiness lies inside us.
  • Caring for others: Believe it or not, caring for other human beings make your life superb. In caring, action should speak louder than world. I want to share one of my recent experience: “One person was pulling his scooter for simple reason ‘No petrol.’ I was on the way, I seen him and put my bike about 100 meters away. I asked him whether I can help you in some way. He replied can you please drop me to nearest petrol pump.  Then we gone in search of petrol pump, after three unsuccessful attempts we got success, it is about 6-7 km from that place. After returning to initial location that person was so amazed, he took his goggles and he insisted ako forced to take me that. He told that I was praying to God for helping me out and God listened to me. I was so amazed, still I don’t know the reason why stopped ath that place. It was not the big thing for me. But it given me enormous happiness that even negligible help can be so important for a person and has god really given me honour to be the messenger!!”
  • One of the biggest problem we have is “ego”. Yes!! The “I” factor. We hardly use the word “We” it is always I factor. This will be covered in the next section.
  • The only thing true about life, it goes on. Every problems/pain increase taste of small happiness.
  • Be witty not betrayer. Sometime, whenever we face problems, we need to think independently about it and solve the problem rather than running away from problem. It will help in both way – If our decision is bad it will add to experience and if it is good, will help us in gaining confidence to pattern selected for decision making for similar types of problem.
  • Respect others, same way you do to yourself.

These things are considerably cheap and should be avoided:

1. Taking other’s advantage – It make you feel that you are not strong enough!
2. Laughing/Criticising at others- We are having so much dirt inside us, we don’t deserve to criticise others and if you are not having any dirt, then you will surely not criticise others.
3.  Trying to show we are bigger and better: Shamefully, we spend most of our life in comparison and making yourself bit bigger than others. We don’t fight for basic requirement, we fight to adjust and even get better than others. Like

My neighbour got luxurious car. I should have one.

James earned so much money, I don’t have. I should try to grow more richer at any cost.

I  will get dirty if I give something to that bagger. Huh.. that low class people.

Why should I apologise on my mistakes.. Huh.. it is acceptable at my level(ya.. I have too much ego).

Why should I thank my recruiter. I deserves that, even far better than that.. Huh ..

Today, I have everything .. it is my hard work, my empire.. I created this NOT god.

Huh that colleague is more skilled and surely get promotion. I should make him down. That is the only way I can touch the success.

All humans are equal. Yes you  are equal to a beggar and a president because things fluctuate with very little variance.

We are most intelligent and at the same time most dumb species. Most of us might have heard about the concept, something similar to most intelligent robot, which created for our rescue became the biggest threat for human life, robots  started thinking that if they are most powerful, they should capture the world.

We live in the world full of illusion, we are very low at realization of the truth. The only thing, we can realize is Love and Happiness. Still the first factor is trashed away.

How? I got the responses many times. Almost all lovers say one thing – If I would get a choice to love anyone or No one. I would have opted for second option. It also means that love is not a choice. It happens because it has to happen!
So what is the problem? if it exist at higher level of realization.
Unfortunate, but true all divine things are abused at the moment, whether it is love, religion or spirtual leaders it is impact of Kalyuga. However, we should take it as positive:

Love is the magic which always convert human into very pure form. Believe it or not. If anyone bear the consequences of love, they will be more pure and dropped things like ego, jealousness, arrogance, greediness etc. You can also experience piece and relaxation in pain. Love can turn criminals into good man.

Love is giving not gaining.

Lastly, not getting anything in return – It is nature of love. The world is too less for having any return for love.

That means, we are getting pured almost half of us had love at times!! It never happened before!!  We may think that it is because : We are getting a chance to meet people of opposite sex.  Strange but true, we have changed the definition of love according to our convenience. The butterflies around our chest, some strange feelings and importance for the special one is always taken as Love. But it is NOT true.  There are many variants like Crush, Infatuation, Lust, Emotional attachment and respect. Most of them vanishes at some point of time. But we increase scope of love to include all these things and as rightly said it is very difficult to distinguish between these all. Simplest one can be, Love don’t make you mad or blind. Everything will be crystal clear to you, it is not fun and don’t include pleasure. Love is very matured in nature, yet complex to understand. It is not having butterflies associated with the feelings. It is very possible that you will never realize that you are in love with someone. However any other variants make you very excited and you feel very special. Love is quite spiritual in nature and never driven by human.

Why the variants are taking place: If that is just dilemma or illusion then Why it exists. The biggest cause is : As we know that we are moving away from God so we are equipped with lots of negativity. These variants(excluding respect) are part of this negativity. If we involved into good activity and we are more close to god. Things will correct by itself and we will realize the truth.  Best way is to dedicate all your problems to God and let them take care. Remember, Love exist at very high level of realization even more than human body and yet Love is same for all whether it is your parents, your partner, your brother, any physical thing or God. That also means that Love for a person or thing is NOT different then divine love.  Yet love is a separate entity in itself, it is very possible that it can be transformed.

Last, but not the least, in any of the variants you will not believe on me because of blindness and illusion and you wanted to believe that whatever you are feeling is love. The main problem extend a bit further, when a relation is started with any of the variant even if feelings are vanished but they have no option to carry the relation which results into terrible life.

Whatever written above, if we started implementing them then we may be in the short term loss. But not more than 10-20%. But that will surely add a lot to our happiness account.

After reading this article!! First thing, we will do is to forget everything!! We will never see at our next step whether we are making this world bad or not? It is it.. we like this way .. if we like dirt.. what is your(writer’s) problem? My(writer’s) concerns  are simple, if little discipline can make you happy forever So why not? try changing yourself today and you will see the reaction of the world will change for you. There is very less competition in goodness so we all can always win!!


The Life Cycle

March 2, 2010

–I would like to thank Samir, Prateek, Abhishek, Sanjay, Ravi for giving their support and guidance, which added value to this blog post. Without your efforts, this article can not be a SUCCESS.

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19 August 1949 An unknown UFO  is seen at the Death valley. Many villagers are claiming that they have seen a spaceship landed .. sorry kissed the land about 3 meter up from the base.

No hair, Small height, big dangerous eyes without any eyelash, without ear bone.. Tough color, dangerous looks… that’s an alien – a villager spoke..

Lets come back to law of physics: We developed a machine, at initial, it takes time and heavy load to start, once it started running, it got full efficiency at 20% of its life cycle and then its efficiency top out after some period; which is the start of declination. Everyone including us, the human being follow same principle. At initial stage, we require heavy support to grow. After that roughly from the age  of 16-50 we experience consistent growth with little variation and then declination starts and then death. We top out at somewhat mid of our youth life. This fact is based on law of physics there is no machine which can show 100% efficiency throughout its life.

The fourth dimension:

We see, perceive things in three dimension. But our theory is challenged by scientist in 1827 onwards. There are more dimensions.. not 4 .. its 10 or 11d. Still debate is going on in accepting super gravity as a dimension. But however, in sort there are 10 dimension, but its true we perceive only 3 dimension space.

One of them most important dimension is “time”. We were always excited about it, no.. we normal human can’t see it or feel it. But everyone in the world know that it exist. We always thought that it is impossible to think about time machine.

In 2007, scientists got a breakthrough in this space with the concept of bending space-time. Now they are trying to make it in closed special shape. Another research come from Einsteins theory of relativity.. if their is black hole which absorb things then there should be white hole which emits that things.. because all physics law are symmetric in nature.

Everyone know, one day we will realize time machine. No.. not in next few years but in next few decades.

Wait! How can we say it? There is nothing stored as of past. How can we travel back? I hope you might have heard about hypnotism. Hypnotism has proven that our brain is quite powerful in keeping track of all history and gaining consciousness of always every instant we every spent. Travel among different life, imagine things and many more. So ya! we can perceive past.

Lets assume, we are having anything on the name of time machine. It exists, now how can ‘that future’ impact our present. They are already impacting. Lets again look back at the description of stealth technology i.e. plane which are not detected by R.A.D.A.R, many scientist suggested that technology is borrowed from aliens. Scientists are not even able to understand the creation of spaceship!!

What are aliens? Big eyes, no lashes, no nails – hair, without ear bone. Always aliens come and disappear in very short time span. We always believed that they are from other space. But one strange thing, everytime, we see spaceship and after sometime .. spaceship is lost in the air.. no one claim the existence for a long time. Because that was not a spaceship.. that may be just a time machine!! Aliens are nothing but the human of the future.  No .. it is not possible they look quite different!!! Isn’t it?
We know that our body is quite adjustable, it changed a lot according to environment, in the near future, we will be highly impacted by ultraviolet rays. This will soon start burning our eyes specially eye lash. To protect our eyes, eyes will become bigger. All waste like hair, ear bone, nails etc will be vanished. As we heard that in history, kings are having height about 7-8 feet. But now, average height is decreasing and in near future, it will decrease to the size of alien. Another important fact, aliens are having nothing more than what we have today. They are not having any tail or thorn!! Another important fact, that lies in the existence, most of the alien are seen in developed countries. We rarely find appearance of any aliens in poor African/Asian countries. At that time, guys from developed country may be having curiosity to see their past. It is quite obvious that in future world war, developed country will be the best candidate to survive and after that, their races will cover the whole world.

Ok let’s have things one by one. Here I am going to answer things one by one:

How anyone can see the future?

Time is one of the most mysterious dimension. It can be taken as the snapshot of the entire world.

What are the occurrence of events and their relation with the third dimension? How someone can predict the future? These things are impossible.

We always here the fact that our life-cycle is cyclic order after kalyuga, next step will be satyuga and things will continue.

Life Cycle:

In our life, there are two type of pre decided events 1. Fixed 2. Decision. Our life can be portrayed as a workflow diagram where some actions are upto us to decide. Most(if not all) of the things in our life are fixed. There may be very few decisive points.
When we born, we are having our complete fate in our hand. Expert palmist/astrologist can predict it to the greater extent i.e. they can predict what can happen in your life based on certain stars or palm lines. So there are something very accurate and fixed, which can be predicted.

So that’s it. Whatever we do till date is fixed then? then I should not be worried about things happen in past!! Ya you should not, even decision events CAN NOT be changed.

According to new research based on gravitational forces, we are JUST a holographic image. We may not really exists!! So our life is a sequence of major events.

Wait! There are other things! It is not only our life events.. there are some global events which happens including accidents. They are part of system.

So Life Time consist of fixed events, predecided events and meeting with global events.

Now taking it at minute level:

We, the Human

Who are we? Wait and think about it.. hmm got an answer. We do exist in this world for thousands of years, we are the same. I feel that it can be changing of snake’s skin.

Emotion, Alas! we, even the director of matrix believed that our emotions CAN NOT be an outcome of equation. I believe it is. Emotions helps us in building relations and binding which help us to be socialize and unite. It is strong bond between us. But unfortunately, emotions rules us to some extent. It is important for our survival, emotions exist in every living species. If controlled, emotions can become very aggressive powers and motivational factor. It can also act exactly opposite.

So, leaving the emotional part apart.. what is our exact nature good or bad? Simplest answer will be GOOD infect very GOOD. We are befooled with the game of senses and emotions to let them choose our direction. I would like to keep some views on lines of Swami Vivekananda speech

“You will find two things everywhere. Sex and Ego. God has made sexual desire very very powerful for growth of species. Ego is chief things and sex lies on it. If we identify our true potential then all such sexual urge will be in control. Believe it or not, Most of the things we do is directly or indirectly related to Sex like fashion, perfume, body building, cinema, dance, hotels etc.”

I have a strong believe that physical intimacy make very heavy emotional bond. This bond can be sufficient to live a life with someone, that’s why it may be first thing after marriage. This bond is not infatuation but ya, its not love even.

Human and the God

It is very unfair, Most of the god are human. Then why they have created us so weak? Why we are not having that “special” fact. We are only having matured big brain! Is that the only difference between us and other living creatures?

Think… Think… Think… Oh! Got the solution!!! NO? Let me help you.

We are very powerful. We can walk on water, we can fly in air, we can see the future, even we can change the future event, we can control nature. We can control animals and many more .. All these things are lies inside us only. We only need to realize and unlock that hidden potential.

Ok! Wait!! According to your thinking, we are having so much power then why anyone realizes such powers never helps us? Why they left us to fate? are they too selfish?

We are living in a system. This system is ongoing and has processes. Only people who have unlocked some of the inner potentials, can clearly understand this system. So they are aware about processes and rules/regulations associated with it. We are part of the system and we are NOT supposed to make dramatic changes in the system. If we will, we will be directly thrown out of the system regardless of any major facts.

Everyone should be selfish. Love yourself most, then others. It is law of survival.

However, I haven’t got enough favorable opinion. but it would not be a surprise if everything we see, perceive and sense may really NOT exist at all! They exists for binding us to the mortal world and to control our power.

Regarding Sex: Both male and female seems to be equally powerful. According to Hindu their supreme power is recognized as Shiva and Shakti. However, power of Shakti extended scope and touches males also.

So God gifted us this life to add some values to the world. We are most powerful species.

Content is in revision phase. If you are tracking this post and interested to know updates. Please subscribe by dropping an email to author(mouse over for emailId).


Happiness Mantra

January 12, 2010

Your key to real happiness: http://deomurari.com/humor/


Your Personal Remedy

July 6, 2009

When we face some problem at our work, we should try to look out for strategic solution with the help of our cognitive skills and experience. We did a lot in our professional life but things differ when we have to deal with our personal life. Almost all personal consultants can give better solution than the one, they decided for their personal problems. If we examine further, we may get response as
“Hey! My problems are quite difficult then my clients. I accept, I am not the best to solve them!! Otherwise I would be the happiest one..”. .The long silence,..the realization that somewhere something went wrong, a pause! digging the internal!! .. Hey, I(consultant) never thought that way before!! Really!!! whom am I to solve other’s personal problems when I can’t solve mine? I am not the best one to solve personal problems.. am I? What’s wrong with me??
If we started taking the same, many of us may think in the similar fashion at some point of time: I have given guidance to many friends but I can’t able to solve mine own relative problem. Is mine personal problems are difficult than others? A simple answer is NO. What went wrong!! The answer lies in the basics of thinking and its relation with our sentiments.
We always treat our personal problem as kinda disaster by adding worry and other concerns to main problem. Interestingly, we are so busy that we even forgot to put efforts in solving them!! I know, many of us, who faced some personal problems may be agitated by this fact. It may seems harsh, but “true”. We rarely concentrate on solving the problem, we atmost expect that how it can be avoided(i.e quick fix or workaround) or delayed. Why its so?
We are best in solving other’s problem and specially our area of expertise.. a computer architect may be best in providing solution for your technical problem, doctor is best in providing solution to our health problem. Psychiatrist are best in solving mind and some personal problem. But at home, they all are helpless.. OK! they are not expert in providing solution to their personal problems, they need to learn about that problems to give a better solution; isn’t it?? Again big NO.. It is only having a psychological barrier. Our mind works in similar logical aspect to solve a problem regardless of behavior. There are two aspects, we are going to cover:

1. How should we look at the problem and solve them
2. Planning the life in the way that future will be more safe and secured

If you explore the internet, you can find there are many steps/solutions given by different philosophers, however most of the solution converges to reinforce one hidden point. We are going to take more on this “hidden” point, which is first time(here) referred directly.

We say, we “humans” are having most complex life. Lot more than any other species on earth..They can do whatever feel like but we can’t!Why :( ?

It’s us, who define our life and surrounding environment.. we defined relations..we created society.. all in all it is for our own convenience. Then!!! what went wrong?? are we facing problem by the rules and regulation virtually or mutually agreed by us?? Are we?

We keeps on diversifying and merging at such rate that we created things dense and complex. We(and the God) choose the level of complexity of our life by choosing our lifestyle, our loved one’s, our targets and some other relative factors. If we want peace, we can directly erase all relations and can take a shad in mountain’s peak; be a saint!! But its same as
I close my eyes and feel that every problem related to me are solved, it was like a bad dream over.” Many of us solve problem in similar fashion.
Unfortunately, there is no panacea available.
At some point, heart follows the mind. Its true that every feeling is realized by mind but may felt in heart. When we enter the world, we automatically attach to many relations, even though we were not aware about meaning of the word “r e l a t i o n”.
To our wonder! our heart started accepting the things in the way its decided by our society..My brother/sister, my parents, my grandpa. Even in long run.. I married to that girl, she is my wife and father in law etc. If something stuck to our mind, which may be natural..but we always learn, that its wrong .. means it is. We automatically started feeling guilty for that. It is something to do with our tradition and values. Mind plays very important role in identifying good or bad. However, It may not be in the scope of the topic! I just wanted to evaluate how things actually work and a clear segregation of the difference between mind,heart and its roles.
Every problem, whether personal or work related can be mapped in one problem domain space. We can find solution in the same way(for both), however criticality differs. Sorry to be harsh, but sometimes we blow into emotions or worry and we act like a fool to solve our personal problem. I will give many example to explain it in simpler terms. I believe that mostly, neutral and experienced person are having better solutions. Not clear? take it in two parts.. First neutral.. i.e. no heavy emotions or worries with regards to the problem which give maximum power for brains to work on. Secondly, “Experience”- it matters in two aspects.. First if they experienced the problem, then they might have solved it, Its human tendency to dig further the solution in order to improve over our decision making capability, to give better solution in the next attempt. If person already experienced that situation he will also be aware about criticality of that problem and pros and cons associated with it(Married one may say don’t marry :D ).
Phew.. too big things!! Lets bookmark it, dumping everything at once is not good idea.
Now direct to the point, if we require to solve, we should know that we are going to follow some solution strategy with critical measures and NOT obvious reactions due to sequence of that problem or its consequences. Lets understand the difference between solution and obvious acts –
We are going to include some of the real life examples, which I feel are good for illustration:(Nearly all examples are inspired from real life events). All are obvious acts and NOT the solution.

General Solution: First, we need to believe that there is no problem in the world which can not be solved. I just want to remind you, I am strictly talking about “problems” only. However, factors of efforts, self confidence and motivation required may vary according to the problem, its complexity, its current state and positives and negatives related to that problem. Remember, for any problem there are two parties, one which really favors solving the problem and others who never cares about problem and unknowingly working on making it more difficult. In general, positive parties include all persons who loves you and matured enough to make a positive impacts regarding the problem(which nearly can be estimated to <5 persons). and other party includes society and other relatives/friends etc who don’t have direct impact on that problem.NO PROBLEM IN THE WORLD CAN BE SOLVED PERMANENTLY BY FORCE.

Smoking and Drinking problem: Here comes the gizmo’s.. It is always been the biggest problem for any family. Lets see the scenario what a normal person or many of us who is reading it for the first time may react:

Ritch is a heavy drinker.. It has been four years of his marriage with her beloved Alice. Ritch is a very good person. He fully concentrate on his work, love his family and always try to maintain good relations with others. But somehow, things are not going in his favor. He is a heavy drinker, which is eating the measure chunk of his “hard earned” money. After delivery of his only son Dennis.. their marital relation gone bad. They spent most of the time cursing each other and ya, the god for giving them “bad” partners. They just forgot their 9 years old love and hundreds of sacrifices to make this relation alive. First time, Alice told Ritch.. “you nuts.. you can’t understand anyone’s feeling.. you always afraid of things.. so you take help of drinks. That’s all you are.. just drinking all our hard earned money. You just gulped our happiness for your noble pleasure, are you having any idea, how are we living in these conditions? Why are we not happy like our neighbour Mr. & Mrs. Smith. Why you can’t throw this out?” First time in life Ritch got badly hurt. His eyes got wet and he tried to say something but just a light whisper with heavy heart.. hardly touched Alice ears! “This! this all!! I loved you madly! I always preferred your happiness over mine.. I faced all situations, I sacrificed a lot to make you happy.. and now you are telling me ..nuts.. just for the drinking reasons!!”. Two unnoticed tears rolled out of his cheeks and taken rest at the carpet. That was the end of this happiest couple. Obvious enough, for one week, Ritch tried hard to come out of his drinking habits, every time her wife kept on cursing him, by all means “forcing”. Ritch fought for one month… but sure enough.. no luck..Time spent.. and they started carrying their relation for the sake of their child’s future. Love lost in dark and found work of watering eyes. Continuous forcing and negative waves made it worst, finally it ends with a divorce.
Have you seen someone doing the same? Is that a solution or obvious acts?
Now lets see the solution:
Problems: Smoking and Drinking problem
Solution: First we take necessary steps to take it as a problem. It’s a problem and there may be a person who suffered from that problem. If that problem is taken out of that life then that person may be really good. OK!! now stop complicating that person’s life. If any person is in problems then he/she may be willing to have the best solution for that problem. So motivation factor is already there. Lets take a solution of above listed problem(take this ending)
Alice soon started realizing that Ritch is having drinking problem and this problem can not be cured at once. So forcing/emotional blackmail or impact view may not be able to solve it. Alice approached Ritch, holding his hand and told in a low tone, I can understand. I still loves you. I was just angry, I am with you, always. This has done a magical impact of Ritch, Ritch just reassured that he need to take out from that drinking problem. Alice supported Ritch decision. Ritch joined best alcohol rehabilitation center. Alice understand that it takes some time so next time when she saw, at times, Ritch drinking heavily. She haven’t reacted, without creating a scene. Soon magic started, Ritch found something more important for him than alcohol. He really started caring about his family, the only thing which rejoice his happiness. However it has taken about 1 year to fully recover from that state. So patience, courage and love made the magic in Alice’s life.
Lets take another look. Our next example::

Dealing with criminals
Mr. Sunil always taken his son “Ram” as his proud. His elder brother Shyam is capable enough of understanding their responsibilities and done too good for his brother and other family members. But things started hurting them when surrounding of Ram started turning bad. Most of his friends are indulge in criminal activities. Soon winds started blowing from other end which impacted Ram’s behavior and thinking. Obviously, Shyam has an important role to play here. He started pressurizing Ram to be away from his new friends, Shyam bitten his younger brother badly. Ram agreed, but he again kept contact with them, now things were hidden. One day, when Shyam realized that things are not changed and it even became worst.
He started shouting on his younger brother, slapped him and warned him to stop doing these things again. But things again gone worst and now ‘out of control’, so it started impacting Shyam’s life which reflects in his behavior. Even though no change in the things!!! Story goes on.
This is the expected approach or obvious acts. Isn’t it. It seems that this is the best way to get things resolved.. If you think so, you really need to read this article once more.
Problems: Dealing with criminals
Solution: First of all its important to understand that why anyone is involved in it. Somewhere something is overlooked by Ram. Ram should have track of Shyam’s surrounding. Its important to understand Ram’s priority. What is he finding in them? Anyways, these things can not be solved in one day. Rather then shouting on his brother and threatening him or his friend! Its important to make him to change the way of thinking rather than forcing to change. Support good friends of shyam, ask his old trustable friend to assist him. Sit with shyam, try to give him more time in understanding his pin points. Sometimes, we can also take emotional advantage of the things – who is more important. Something need to understand “Don’t ever abuse his friends or him for this.” Let him realize what you actually wants and why? Soon you will realize that the things will change. Have patience, even if the things got worst, don’t loose your patience. Have faith on God. Continuous struggle will make it solved.-
Typical Love Problems:
Here is another problem involving typical age group (around 20-30 years) . Now It’s very serious concerns and eligible to be added to this article.
Richard is simply outstanding person. Smart, intelligent and career oriented. He put a positive fan around him which impressed many girls. But however, he preferred to make himself reserved and always found a better place to invest time. Still he was most discussed topic around girls. Time spent, soon, cupid blessed him with the divine feeling of love for a girl Mary. As usual Richard tried to hide his feelings, just to protect any mishaps and tried continuously to concentrate on their original target. Something never means to be hidden, it flashed a bit to pass a buzz to the surrounding. As usual, when disclosed, Mary was really angry that now Richard started flirting with her. She got really angry as it may put effect to her image. She stopped having any communication with him. She also felt that Richard is a big flirt because he use to talk with many girls. Girls started minting her to ensure their flirt assumption should become stronger with time. A silence put a big disturbance in Richard’s life. Richard never able to understand whats going on behind the scene. Time passes on to make things worst. Poor Richard keeps on trying to contact to her. Everyone started abusing him that why he want to waste time for that type of girl(Mary)? Mysterious communication gap made it worst. He continue to take on the pain(read more at Love the mystery revealed). However love impacted his personal and professional life badly. It just associated to his current pain. People keep on forcing him in order to make him understand that he is going in wrong track and it will only spoil everyone’s life. Days passed on, Richard continuous to fight with himself but it started spoiling his career and no doubt the personal life. On the other end, Mary keep on acting against him. At the end his life was ruined.
I really wonder; we expect this behavior from a teenager but what should we do if that case happens with a matured person like Richard? Is that impact of films or need of love? What do you think? these type of person should be badly punished.. isn’t it? In love and crush related cases things should be straight forward ‘make’ or ‘break’. This is the practical approach. If we keep on with things which is not logically beneficial for us then obviously it made everyone to loose. Although we should not write these things but if that person made a suicide attempts due to continuously taking on unbearable pain then!!(To neutralize suicidal tendency, Read your most precious moments and Every Human Being is special). It would have impacted life of every associated one. What would be the image of that person? How that person can face the world? Don’t you think the same? Let me know your views..

Problems: Typical Love Problem
Solution: First we need to understand, Love/Crush or any other variant may directly impact heart, really(Love) or virtually(Crush). So mind has very little to do with the things. In most of the cases, these things happen automatically. Its very obvious that its impact can be as of drug which produce very high intensity of love or hate. Whatever that person do in that period is just an impact of Love/Crush. So that period should never be keep into account in judging that person. So are they need to understand, what are they doing? Surprisingly NO. You CAN’T help, they may be aware what are they doing and what can be the impact but however, they can’t move out of the things. They adopt it personally. However, These type of things should be done with intense care. Mary can easily hurt Richard. Hurting anyone may be the worst thing of the world. Mary need to show some intelligence and understanding. Mary should understand the value she may be having in Richard’s life. I talked to one of my friend and explained this scenario – My friend quickly told me that his life will be like “living dead”. To harsh to share, but somewhat true. Loving someone is life switching i.e. if you love someone, everything change and someone else may have very strong presence in your life(More at Love the mystery revealed). Main source of lover’s happiness is their love. Everything else may be contribute to partial happiness. We all experience love in our life. We got love from parents, family, good old friends and many more. It is one of the most important factor of life, every other things are spontaneous pleasure/happiness. All are having similar characteristics. It need to be addressed that crush may include possessiveness and react slightly different than Love. However we don’t ever have to reveal actual difference between this terminology. It can break many relations. Back to the problem, here Ram may be continuously worried about Mary. It will be worst if he is not able to look whether Mary is happy or not. If Mary stopped responding then level of stress for Ram is going to increase, she may try to reduce the communication gap. Level of stress will continuously to increase with the time. soon it may reach to unbearable level of stress and may impact Ram’s health and can increase suicidal tendency. Impact in the middle period is unpredictable. It is also interesting that the level of dedication and sacrifice in love is so strong that experts advised that for loving anyone, one should love yourself before loving others. In this case, whatever the Mary’s decision. Mary should avoiding hurting Ram and further impacting his life. Mary should not abuse Ram’s life. There may be little problems, but however it is manageable.. Love is always treated as being the good thing due to its behavior, however it can put worse impact Love is Evil Article. Things written to heart are very difficult to erase. If you are in love then I believe that your partner is best in deciding your life. I believe that breaking hurt is the worst thing anyone can do. I don’t know how much may be aware that broken heart is physicaland can be in form of acute heart attack. It can weaken your heart(traumatic impact). However, heart can be healed with intense care and deep rest for 3-4 months. Apart from its psychological and emotional(which may last life long) impacts, it can also lead to various symptoms to severe problems.

Lets peek into problems of businessman Raju…
Businessman’s problems:
Raju is the owner of firm indulge in export business. Raju taken a lot to make firm in the state, it is, today. Raju wants her son Manish to go on the same line. He want that Manish should follow his defined way, which is chosen by him and make this firm grow bigger and bigger. When Manish was in 12th. Raju trying to make him biased toward business and forced him to do BBA and then MBA, which may help him in joining their family business- Raju’s whole sole asset. But however, Manish is too keen in sticking with his computer and doing hit and trial to various sites. These things always made Raju bit angry. Time keeps running and Raju’s frustration increased day by day..
Ok! Ok! then.. look at the reason of join to nuclear family migration.
Problem: My son should follow me..
Solution: We should understand two things, every generation differs from the previous for many reasons. There is no level of saturation. Everyone is having different mindset. It is general belief that if you got something so easily, you will never realize the real values of the things. Raju might have done tremendous job, but if he really want to make Manish do the same. Never force Manish to do the things. Involve him only if he is interested. Its upto him to decide what’s good for him. We can only deviate thoughts and can help them in better decision making.

Joint to Nuclear Family Migration
I just keep bugging people to know more about their observations!! Interestingly world consist of various trouble and troubleshooters, but all having different approaches. I rarely found anything common between views of two persons. One of the view is migration of joint family to nuclear. India was known best for having joint families in late 19’s but there is heavy migration. Is it the impact of western culture!! Nope.. Its our internal conflict.
The change we are seeing in Indian culture today is the correction which need to happen at some point of time. Its not today. If you take a look at history, you will find lots of attempts of correction and its recovery. Now we got support from west, which made the breakthrough. More on this in near future..
This mix cultured and different generations made a huge different in integrity of joint family. Many of us think that wife is the main cause of all such family problems. I believe that your wife favors you, with the only reason that she is more selfish

:-)
:-)

. I know, this sentence will be always in doubt.Now, Money is also one of the core importance. There are step by step breakdown of joint to nuclear family:
Step1: Senior members started getting annoyed with the change in next generations which act like a spark in internal conflicts.
Step2: That conflict may lead to social or financial matters.
Step3: Things will be indirectly communicated so that no one can understand the original matter
Step4: It will give rise to all small matters which was hidden but accumulated with time.
Step5: Everyone thinks that splitting will solve the problem so they split into nuclear family.
After splitting, problem started increasing due to lack of dependency and support. These things have after shock impact. They want to get together or atleast improve relation.. but.. no hopes.
Solution: First, we need to understand the need of changing world. Mostly, big joint family is not supported with future view of the things. Isolation may actually improve relations. I believe that it require strong gum of love/affection and respect to make joint family together. But however, with the changing world many people may not like it and it may be wrongly interpreted as intrusion to their privacy. Best advantage of joint family will be heavy financial and emotional support. To work out with the joint family, each member should understand that their may be need of changing world around them and new member, being the part of family. They should respect each other’s privacy and opinion and not unnecessary surpassing any other’s viewpoint. It should be taken for sure that still someone may not feel comfortable in that environment.

Anyone interested, can suggest us solutions in comments. However, it will be published soon is successive drafts of this topic.
These completes the general view regarding problem and solution space.I end with another hint. I found this quotation: Perfectly fit for problem solving..
Don’t Make Assumptions. Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.
So, if you have not done this! then surely you may have ended with taking wrong decisions for your life.

I saved my future:

Lets see where some of us lacks.
I believe that best way to earn money is to predict the future. It’s also a strong point that predicting future in the correct way, can lead to good luck. Luck is also interesting thing. It can be taken as mix of solution to relative probability of domain including targeted people/dream, opportunity and heuristics knowledge. Fortunately, People’s awareness about predicting future is increasing. Lets see how predicting future impact our life…

One old man sitting in relaxing chair with lots of tension .. cursing his luck for all the mishaps. I gone to him and asked what happened.. he told that I am looking for options to arrange enough money for my grand daughter’s marriage. I tried many times but never succeeded. Now I want more than 5000$ in one month. I wonder how can I arrange that?

Solution: We always hear that ‘Prevention is better than cure’. We mostly related it with health. But the rule applies for almost all things. All conditions in I saved my future explains that how prevention is far better than cure(if any) to situations. In current situation, The old man should have planned about 5000$ before the things happen. It is easy to save such chunks of money in a lifetime.

Take another look:
Problems of NRIs:
“One Indian couple settled in USA. After long time i.e. more than 25 years, Mr. Sanjay(Father) told his son(Vicky) to marry to an Indian girl. Vicky given a rude reply. “Dad! Its my life and I will make all decisions, I don’t want anyone to interrupt, so don’t come in my way. I will marry to the girl, which I feel like.”, Sanjay’s face shrank, his dream is over.
What about this one
Expense Management:
Liza is having last few breaths remaining.. Lots of tears surrounded her. Everyone was in a low. Shem keep on shouting outside ICU. Its all my mistake! I am responsible for her conditions!! Today, I am helpless!! This recession taken my job and wife away from me.. Oh god! Why you did it to me.“.
Just a synopsis: Liza was suffering from skin cancer. Shem is happily married person, manager of Meryl Lynch bank with handsome salary of 100,000USD per annum. Liza was well on the go, till the recession and her health hits her. Shem was not prepared for this blow. He arranged money from every options to assure his survival for few months. But constant expenses of one of the best hospital of California was simply unbearable. It has to end some way..
There are endless examples which can be seen in one form or other..
Solution to all such remains in the core idea. your thought may be “No one predicts about their future.. Its nonsense.. these are very big problems and I don’t feel that anyone can solve the problem. It is all due to Luck. Poor luck is most abused thing of the world and it is mostly responsible for almost all bad thing happened in your life.. Ya! but at the times to take credit of goodness then we say atmost that luck helped us but its all my courage and desire to excel the things. Its not only luck, no way…
We can foresee almost all of the problems which we can face in the future and we can prioritize accordingly. Some are common among individuals. Like in the first example, its obvious that guy born and brought up in USA may not have typical Indian thinking!! Then why his father even expected him to marry to an Indian girl? This reply is very obvious. Although its not the solution. I am not giving the solution, I just want to throw a light which may lead to a solution.
One poor family member can have many responsibility. That person may say “I am poor. I can’t help in relaxing my future problem. I know, problems will come.”.It reminds me to great saying of Billgates:
“If you born poor it’s not your mistake, But if you die poor, it’s your mistake”, interestingly, I found lots of comments discussing what the use of money after death and relative absurds. It simply means that all in all how much you made of your life? You got an initial environment which is not in your control. But your courage, progress, ability to improve your skills and visualization to implement your big dreams is still in your hand. It may be difficult but it is not impossible. Honestly, everything have its pros and cons. Even if we talk about rich family It may be equally difficult to reach own targets. So that ‘poor person’ already declared himself as a “Looser”.. no .. he is NOT a looser, he is coward. Looser can progress cowards can’t. You can relate it as “accepting defeat before playing.”. This is my definition of coward. That type of person can hardly progress, they are more dependent and they always seek for external motivating factor. Spark lies within us! we only need to realize it to ignite the fire. You need not to find it outside us.

Problem lies in almost everyone’s life. If you never felt that in your life then you missed a greater opportunity to learn. Your life becomes more important and directional when you face a problem. It also aid to your bearing capacity and better decision making ability. Best way to solve your personal problem is to take it as a general problem and try to solve it more consciously and in independent manner. Independent simply means that neglecting the presence that you are having in victim’s life and other involved; thinking from his/her end to have better visualization of problem and its impact and thinking what’s best for him/her. This concept however leads to one trait of Golden rule(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ethic_of_reciprocity). If you start thinking independently, you reached at first step to better tomorrow.
Waiting for your comments and suggestion, which always helped us in improving my writing skills and views.
Revised Draft. I will appreciate if you can spent some time in helping others by providing your feedback or commenting on for better solutions i.e. If you are chosen to give solution to any problem listed in this topic, what would be your way of solving it?
Final revision with solution will take some time. Feel free to communicate anything with us. We are here to help you out in making a better tomorrow.


The Women’s World

March 8, 2009

Today, I am going to write about donors of this world who bestowed us most valuable thing “the life”. God empowered her by making them extraordinary. A idol of love, sacrifices, goodness, but always unrequited by male dominating world. One of the most insecure race of the world(women) due to more secured race(male). We(male) always say that things are changing we are having respect for women!! do we really do?
Today when we claim that there is no problem for girls!! Lets take a clear picture, how secured every women’s life is…

Two boys trying to chase a girl in front of one famous girls college. Girls was rashly running  on her scooty, hundreds of people surrounding that place, just keep doing their work like nothing happened, its a usual things i.e. everyday we see the same! This is just we are, why should we bother if anything unusual is happening infront of us. Better to be Blind! Today, in 2009 and onwards, are we sure that girls are living with the same liberty as guys are?!! Why some of us are so CHEAP that they keeps on teasing and flirting with girls just putting excessive advantage of their flirting experiences and trying to fool around with girls? Why we keep on staring at girls and annoying them when we can’t to our sister, mother and other close relatives!! Why we guys abuse girl when we came to know something bad about them and make things spread like fire, when we can’t do it for our friends or other guys? Why this world is male dominating world? Why women’s are not getting equal rights, even though their are many person who keeps on shouting that stop girl’s reservation!! Don’t give them discount, we are giving enough respect to them, then why we never trust the world for our sister/wife’s safety and let them face the world without any personal attention!! Why we never feel ashamed in hurting and ditching a girl but shouting and spreading bad images about her when she revert in the same manner. Today, in this world, why most of us demand for a boy child rather then a girl child. In many developing country including India, we always see girls with unequal eyes, why we can’t trust on them. In developing country, some people started worrying about girl’s marriage from the day,when a girl child born. Here most wondering outcome is that girl’s home is most dangerous place for her. In backward and developing countries, girls are always treated secondary, they are beaten badly at homes, they are the one who always asked to compromise and do sacrifices, our society discreditably abuse girls at simple mistakes. The global sex ratio is 105 boys for 100 girls, Then why in India girls ratio is as low as 750 girls for 1000 boys in some parts!! About 10 million female fetuses aborted in India and  more than 5,00,000 female foetuses are being aborted every year.

Every year, more than half a million women die as a result of pregnancy or childbirth complications, including about 70,000 girls and young women aged 15 to 19. According to psychologist Susan Fiske, Men are more likely to view women as sex objects after seeing sexy images. About 1 of 3 girls may be a victim of sexual assaults. Only 39% of rapes and sexual assaults were reported to law enforcement official. 75% of male and 55% of female students involved in date rape using drinking or drugs. most of the rape(more than 50%) happen for age below 18 years. A U.N. Population Fund report claimed that up to 70 per cent of married women aged 15-49 in India are victims of beatings or coerced sex.

Women aged 14 to 24 experience the highest per capita rate of intimate partner violence, 42% of rape victims told no one about the assault and only 5% reported to police. We use religion to dominate, subservient, abuse and kill women all under the guise of religious doctrine. Domestic violence is the leading cause of homelessness for women.  An estimated 33% to 50%  women are battered at some point in their lives. Womens bear the brunt of substance abuse by others.  At many places people use to kill girls infants. Even governments is not having strict laws to protect them. These types of person should be killed on the spot.

Dowry is a big stubborn abuse to nearly all countries, hitting major areas around south Asia and other Muslim countries. In a survey, 70% parents reported dealing of dowry by marriage agents. Its really very shameful to know that dowry is outcome of bourgeois mentality of parents and their relatives. Nearly 80% of unmarried men and women told that they will not take dowry.  In Asian countries, dowry is taken as one of the traditional of marriage and it is taken as part of marriage ceremony. The disease has spread so fast that girls parents don’t have any choice except paying for that. Boy’s parents are taking dowry as a big chance to drive money. In my view, dowry is same as selling the girl for life time. Some people are quite free to accept western culture of love marriages but it is bad to know that even in love marriages their is concept of dowry(I don’t know why they call it love then?). No doubt, if love exists then love marriages are quite better(if it is acceptable) but due to associated excitements many girls just trapped by guys and others just given up their life without realizing that its love or not. Sometimes, girls don’t want their parents to throw any money in the name of marriage, that also force them to move to this step even though they know that guy is not the perfect match for her. I just wanted to share a past experience, I tried to convince my old friend to put a report against dowry demanded by boy’s party. He refused with comments that it may affect the girls life!! Because not only he, every one else, surrounding that cultural or geographical boundary takes dowry!! Many guys started marrying only to get that lump sum of money. I can’t ever believe that their can be any Love, if the relation are bound with dowry. Result can not be fruitful, there will be NO LOVE. If  I would have fleeced money on my marriage to a girl I love, then surely I can’t ever able to make honest eye contact with her!! So if you are from guy’s end then remember some thousands/lacs of money can steal your brother/son’s happiness for lifetime.

As our world started advancing, their is need for strong bound of Love and Affection because the season of sacrifice and compromise and bearing is moving on. We need to accept the change and necessity of love in our life. Dowry Problem is so severe that western country already trying to put it in legal terms like USA state Dept. already warning citizens at “DOWRY/VISA DEMANDS” section about traveling to India for marriages.

Women-owned businesses are booming then Why do women’s still earn less than man. In workforce, Two out of every three working women have no pension. Illiteracy ratio of women is quite high in comparison to male some of the reasons may be : lack of time, family responsibilities, lack of motivation, poverty, opposition by husbands, and difficulty to access where literacy classes are taught.

Women should understand one thing that government body has empowered them for their safety and security concerns with numerous biased law and regulations, we believe that women’s statement is always judged heavier. But unfortunately, some womens are misusing biased legal laws and abusing women class. With the awareness of law, case of husband harassment, blackmailing(for Bangalore there is a number to support victim husbands:3500895, Tuesdays and Fridays, 7 p.m. to 9 p.m.) are increasing day by day.

According to Hindu religion, every women contains some part of Adi Shakti (Adi shakti is energy which generates entire universe). They are very powerful. There power may not be physical, but there woe have the power to  destroy anyone.  Women are having “emotional power, which is miles ahead from physical strength. According to Vedas and other religions. Most important place in this world is of  ‘mother’.

Most of us may be still commenting that now a days they face same problems with girls. Just to update, all fingers are not equal, so creating view points by interacting with some of them is not logical. Many readers return with the comment that we are aware with the situation but we can’t do anything!! Really!! This world is made of you, you are educated enough to inspire everyone else, its your duty to be a messenger and root out the evil. Come on, only we can make a better tomorrow. Lets have a new dawn of indiscriminate world.  Lets give women a gift of new beautiful world. If ‘we improve’ then whole world can..

*This blog topic requires cleanup. Blog topic mostly suitable for developing countries. Please give your hand in making it truly global. Write to us.”


Accept Yourself

October 6, 2008

We started seeing the competitive world, sometime cursing our fate for not being the “best” of the world. We started to feel jealous with an illusion that other one is superior then us may not be in quality but in satisfying her need or situation at current instance. At one aspect, jealousness can be an outcome of alternative need.

These jealousness may lead to frustration and some times into anger.

Why we feel something like that? is It some short of deficiency or luck? We try to find references in dozens of books about how to grow, mental peace and other personal affairs. But we hardly implemented any of them, most of the books just extended their stories and provide some way comparative environmental generalized view, which may not be suitable for us.

Many researches shows that motivational factor is one of powerful candidate at employee’s success. It is one of the accelerating agent in  having good professional life and personal too. Let’s analyze, why we think we can’t and all relative absurd feelings. From my view, most important thing is first we should understand our power and dimensions at different levels which may require segregation at different levels. It is better to analyze self potential.

We should understand that nobody is perfect, so we may found ourself less capable at some points and more capable at others. We can further categorize factors as which are by birth or can be developed. Now for ‘by birth’ capability like leadership, we are having little chance to improve but it never means that we should not try to improve it, knowing the complexity, if we try to do micro-analysis then we can find that improvement over one factor minutely affect many others. For sake of understanding, if we try to improve our leadership skill then our managerial capability will have direct impact to it. Once we keep chart of our capability and losses. We can differ our thoughts toward our personal and professional development.

It is also true that we can’t improve something at benchmark level, fortunately, even not required due to inversion of one factor to another,  like improving management skill to extreme level may lead to some detoriation in inter team skills in the role as a coleauge or as a friend.  Because management somewhat related to ‘using emotions’ rather than expressing it. So we should have our future plan ready and ‘nearly’ perfect mix of quality required to achieve that.

Secondly accept yourself. Don’t look others to whom you think supersedes you in any way. If you are looking you can’t progress.

Healthy competition don’t deal with comparing factors but with variation in the end results. If both are fighting for one target than first snatcher will be the winner or alternatively the one who scored higher in their respective unit. Be a liar to the word but not to yourself, you should know your exact potential and capabilities.

Many time we hear people stating that one incapable person got such a good result like that person is having very less knowledge then others but he/she is earning many folds than me and in similar fashion. Here comes the role of Xfactor, as these factors are directly not visible and hardly communicated, we use to oversee them. Some are having enriched amount of Xfactor which are most essential constitutes of success. I will further elaborate success in coming articles.

So remember, accept the way god have blessed you and try to utilize it for maximum benefits. Try to improve your skill and skills intelligence too.

*Initial Draft

*In revision.